Posts Tagged ‘kojak’

Poop Damn You. I said POOP!

I am supposed to be working, but I am too angry. My shoulders are wet, my hair looks like a toupee that came out of a street drain and my favorite shoes are damp and may never look as sexy again. Why? Oh because of Kojak. See Kojak doesn’t like to poop in the rain.

It took 4 years of begging and mild tourettes fits in Brooklyn just to get him to pee in the rain, but the pooping – well – he will ONLY go if he has some nice grass. And it has to be nice grass – like a lawn – not a patch around a post.

I walked him all around Portland this morning – walked 25 minutes in horrible rain until I finally conceded and took him to the park.

There is NOTHING more demoralizing than standing in the pouring rain and begging your 9lb dog to poop. Begging! Passers by think it’s so cute. I almost gave my dog the finger. The finger! Can you imagine if someone had witnessed that?

Anyhow – now the sun is out and the sky is blue. Mother nature just thinks she’s so funny.

This guy has created a video on teaching your dog to go on command. I watched about :24 of it and kind of wanted to punch him. I bet he doesn’t even have a dog. Kojak doesn’t “spin” in the rain. He cowers and stares at me with disdain.

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